


absence

by little_sleeping_dragon



Category: The Heroes of Olympus - Rick Riordan
Genre: Aromantic, Asexual Character, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-02
Updated: 2015-11-02
Packaged: 2018-04-29 12:17:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 570
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5127308
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/little_sleeping_dragon/pseuds/little_sleeping_dragon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Absence-(noun)the nonexistence or lack of.<br/>Reyna reflects on what Venus told her.</p>
            </blockquote>





	absence

The words Venus spoke still come back to haunt her. You will not find love where you wish or where you hope. No demigod shall heal your heart. For years she hoped it was false, just an untruth told to her without thought. She hoped she had misheard, misinterpreted it. Because there was no way this could be true. Eventually she put it to the back of her mind. She had other things to worry about. And when she became preactor, she knew there was never going to be time for love, for dates and stolen kisses. When Percy turned her down, telling her he had a girlfriend already, she was starting to come to terms with it. Maybe she was meant to be alone. Her fears that she was broken still existed, but now she was certain that romance, marriage, a family- none of these were what she wanted. And when it became clear her job, would keep any of these dreams, hopes, possibilities from becoming a reality, she didn’t really care. At least that’s what she told herself.

The words only sometimes haunted her. The time a new member of the legion called her emotionless, cold (she pretended she didn’t hear) or the time one of the Lars asked her if she had found a boyfriend. Still stinging from Jason's dismissal, she had roughly told him that she didn’t need a man, that she could take care of herself. The Lar then went on to tell her how important love is, how it is something everyone feels and how it brings humans together, our shared experiences binding us.

Those were the moments the words came back. Creeping into her mind, cruel whispers telling her how messed up she must be if she couldn’t love. How she would become like her father, shattered, cruel, unable to feel anything other than anger and hatred. Because he must have been as broken as she is now to love war.

After the battle, when peace has finally come, she sees all of her friends together. Percy and Annabeth standing, arms around each other's shoulders so content just to be. Seeing Piper and Jason sitting close at the campfire, seeing the smile on Hazel’s face at something Frank just said. Seeing them all at peace, happy, having found someone to love, the words come back to her mind, haunting her.

She somehow finds her voice, and tells Piper part of the story. Just about how she was told all of this, not the fact that she had known this was the truth for a long long time. She can tell from the look on Piper’s face that she is angry at her mother for this. But the response Piper gives her only pains her more. The fear, the worry ,the anger she feels at herself for not being able to just be normal.What Piper says does nothing to help. She knows Piper was trying to reassure her, make her feel better but all it does is remind her of one more thing she will never have.

And if there is someone who is meant for her, all she can do is hurt them. Because she would never be able to love them, at least not the right way, not in the two parts of a whole way. She is going to be alone. It’s better that way. But it still scares her.


End file.
